:: dormant lagi ::

the blog will be dormant for a week or so, unless i could find time and place for blogging. can't wait for the hols!

don't miss me.. ;P

:: random stuffs ::

sakit tekak la pulak! adeh..

well, i'll be having my post natal check up again tomorrow. dr nak investigate the reason why arwah amin's weight is retarded through the end of the pregnancy. he suspect that i might caught some infection along the way that has not been detected through scans and stuff. i just hope that i'll stay strong, because during my last post natal check up, i cried. sbbnya, i started to replay the moments with arwah. i'd be lying if i say that i don't miss him, and wonder how would it be like if he makes it to the world. only Allah knows. and i believe Allah has a better plan for all of us. i'm telling this to myself. i can't forever cry over the loss. i still have afiq and adib to look after! berikanlah aku kekuatan dan kesabaran ya Allah!

anyway, alhamdulillah, i manage to complete my ppt presentation yesterday. so hari nih pretty free, but i decide to look back after my lecture notes (yeah, i do deliver lectures, though once to three times a year. dah turned down one offer though sbbnya clash dengan family program. i think i might need to beef up my presentation. they pay me, so i've to makes sure i do my job.

my bags tak siap lagi pack. (we're going off somewhere with my in laws tomorrow, for a week). banyak lagi nak pack. tengah berkira² nak bawak ke dak portacot tuh. berat la. nak sewa too expensive. (bear in mind, i have to rent two!) bila calculate, cots sahaja (kalau rent) will cost me RM800.00. baik mak shopping weh!

okay la all. i want to look back at my notes. not much time pun ada today, sbb petang nanti ada technical talk. okay la kawan, take care!

:: penatnya smalam! ::

i had a very tiring sunday.

i started pretty early. cooked boys' lunch early in the morning, while me and hubby only had grilled cheese + mushroom sandwich for breakie. we later dropped the boys at mom's place and proceed to visit amin's grave.

after a short tahlil for amin, we head home. quickly changed my cloth and bring the boys to the zoo. afiq and adib enjoyed it though afiq dilanda symptom mengantuk. bought sunglassed yang murah (aa the mommy is so stingy!) for the boys. and the verdict? hehe. anak²ku melaram tak hengat. baru umur setahun setengah dah tau nak melaram okay..

after two hours in the zoo, we head home. the boys fell asleep in the car. penat sangat agaknya. me and hubby take the opprotunity to go out and look for new t's for mommy yang dah outgrown her clothes. (yeah, yeah.. ntah bilanya nak surut..) came back home just in time for zohor. after asar, my mom plak ajak keluar cari kain baju melayu for my bro's wedding in june. knowing that my boys will surelt throw tantrum kalau masuk kedai kain (i agakla..) my other half took them to my IL's house. balik umah just before maghrib.

uwaa.. letih gila!

after maghrib + dinner at mom's house, i head home. kemas baju sket (we're going somewhere), and i finally say to myself, i have to know when to stop. penat teramat² sampai susah nak lelap. at last hubby woke me up at 5.20am
and now i'm in office, flipping between my powerpoint presentation for meeting in langkawi (which i'm not attending due to earlier commitment. ruginya!) kena siap esok, and masih belambak tak siap! adeh. okay la, i have to'minimize' this page and get myself back to work.

hm.. i think i may need a shot of caffeine later.


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:: apa nak masak weekend nih? ::

baru balik dr klcc. shop for my boys. time was pretty limited, as i have to rush back to office, ada meeting after the looooong lunch break. bought a new l/sleeve t-shirt for the boys and socks for them. was looking around for toys as well, but i didn't land to any that i think would interest them (ke mommy?)

my feet hurts la pakai prima shoes tu. camana nih? apsal masa test ari tuh rasa comfy teramat and bila pakai sakit nih? nak kena letak under stress load nih kasi kembang sket. huhu. kalau tak, melayang my RM119. uwaa! kalau tak jalan gak (maknanya kasut tuh really tahan lasak) i might just sell it off, with some reduction.

hmm, ari nih dah ari jumaat. dah start balik lerr routine ku memikir apa nak masak esok. ideas anyone?

:: i miss you ::

i don't know how shall i express my feeling, but i miss my amin so much! he came to my dreams last two days, sleeping on my bed. i know he's no more there, but he just choose to sleep on my bed. what does that mean?

pernah terbau bau bunga melur yang wangi, sekali lalu, 3 times. first occasion kat kubur, i thought maybe ada pokok melur kat mana². 2nd, almost midnight at afiq's cot when i was busy sorting my cloth for course, and the most recent one, is dekat kem, masa i attend course. orang tua² kata, he pays a visit. is it true?

ya Allah, i so miss him so much, that my tears are dwelling! please give me the strength!

:: i choose PRIMA, at last ::

thanx for your votes peeps! after trying on both pairs, i decided to go for prima ~ black. suede tuh mmg cute, tapi it does not look good on my feet. :(

i put it on to office today, but somehow rather kenapa kasut ini ala² makan my feet? macam nak melecet jek, sedangkan smalam pakai sedap jek rase. tak pueh hati nih! hmm.

back to work. i'm trying to instill some motivation in myself. i have to commit and work hard for my kids. so when at work, i should focus and deliver my job well. (though i still blog at office, yang penting keja gua siap and sempurna!)

on the other hand, i'll be flying off with the family to downunder next week. and i'm thining of starting a tiny online business involving clothing, i mean unique clothing. what do you guys thing? will it work?

one more thing that i'm contemplating to do is to go for baking classes before i seriously take orders from others. mom said to me that i can work from home (i.e. quit my secure job) provided that i become a profesional in what i want to do (for example baking).

i also have been thinking to publish story books, but i don't have any idea on how to start. anyone with experience yang boleh share, how shall i go about it?

i believe i'm still far away from being completely free from job.but it's never too early for plannings kan?

:: prima or sueded alice? vote for me please ::

#1 : crocs ~ prima


#2 : crocs ~ sueded alice


vote for me please. which one is better?