:: block.. ::

tuan tanah dilanda writer's block syndromme.

ps - birthday afiq adib in three weeks time. tapi celebration dicepatkan seminggu awal to avoid posa. anak² intak kek gambar thomas sama gordon. mommy bukan artistik la darling. nak buat line pun menggelabah carik pembaris. sahih la mommy order saje kan? kan?

:: cer.pen hari rabu ::

went for health screening this morning. alhamdulillah, first round, ok..

fasting sugar level : 4.7
BP : on lower side (i think it was 90/60). i mmg low BP

yang paling best..

current weight : 52.5kg. wooho!

terus rasa berselera nak makan macam².

here's short update on adib.

scene : he was helping me out with some works. kalau tak silap tolong amek barang and passed it to me.

and he suddenly blurted out to me : cakap apa kat adib????

me : thank you adib.

self note : they're human too, depsite being super young. and they too want to be appreciated. so, ringan²kan lah mulut untuk say thank you to them. :)

:: cuti di hari selasa ::

there's an issue bugging my head, and i just hope the feeling of awkwardness will fade away. i think the decision that i've made is for the better future. i hope.

anyway, last tuesday, i was on leave. hehe. sebabnya nak pegi beli baju raya si kembar duorang tu. we head to klcc and park our car there, lepas tuh naik lrt to masjid jamek. we made it short and precise. takdenye nak membelek setiap satu kedai kat wisma yakin tuh. so we just head to two (DUA SAJA OKAY!!) shops and get the shopping done. so dapat la si afiq and adib 2 pasang baju melayu ngan songkok. otw back, singgah one small shop (so okay, that makes three) beli butang baju melayu & kopiah for the two kiddos. price were ok, definitely cheaper than tempah kat tailor. the kids will be wearing pink (hohohohohoho balas dendam 3 tahun x berbaju raya!!) and turqoise (or as afiq said, bi.yu).

lepas selesai main agenda, which is to get their baju melayu, we returned to klcc for quick lunch and to get some comfy shoes for me. i'm not the kind of typical lady yang ada berpuluh² kasut. i jenis beli satu kasut, pakai sampai hancur, lepas tuh baru ganti. the last time i bought my shoes was masa memula tau i was carrying aidin in my big not so little tummy. and i jenis tak reti nak pakai kasut yang sharp pointed sebab asyik nak tersadung jatuh. yes, i bukanla ladylike type. i prefer practical and comfy shoes. head to modernmum (saya tidak mengandung utk makluman) and bought a pair of shoes. nasib baik tak beli pattern yang sama dengan yang sebelum nih. haha. tapi kasut baru ni tak sebest kasut lama la..

tu la serba sikit cerita hari cuti ai masa korang sume keje. ngehngeh. baju raya anak² sama OH dah settle, baju raya ai jek belum. ai punya haruslah survey berjam² kan kasik puas hati?? maklum la, dah 3 tahun tak dapat baju raya.. :P

okay la people, i'm gonna have a long weekend this week sbb ai cuti isnin-selasa. jangan jeles yek.

ps - sudah raya ganti posa.. yabedabedu!! :P

:: ramblings ::

i've been longing to go on short getaway. life has been busy, kids are neglected, works piling up, frowning lines have increased. all in all, i need to destress.

rindu pulak masa2 belajar dulu esp masa buat masters. (yep, to me masters by course is way easier than degree!) kengkadang tuh seangat nak buat pHd tuh meluap2, tapi bila kenangkan what OH needs to sacrifice, i just put it on hold. unless he decides to join me, then it's a totally different story la kan?

kids are growing up well. afiq and adib dah pandai 'nego' when their interest clashed i.e. nak tgk cartoon apa on player. it is extremely sweet bila dengar diorang nego. haha. kecik2 dah pandai.

aidin on the other hand dah jadi macam handbag mommy. he seems to know the time, bila i'll be back from work. masuk jek rumah, baru nak letak handbag and bukak tudung, he'll let out lil cries asking me to pick him up sebab aidin nak memerap. malam2, he has become my new bantal peluk, that he refused to sleep in his cot. aidin is the 'natural family planner'. hehe.

i'll be off from work on tuesday sebab nak cari baju melayu the twin for raya. (i hate shopping during fasting month.. i'd rather stay home unless i dapat 'mc' puasa. i hate the crowds!) hopefully wisma yakin dah start stock up dengan kids punya baju melayu.

okay la people. blogig off now. da!

:: Haruskah Wanita Bekerja ::

i got this beautiful information to share with all from here

Jawapan bagi persoalan ini saya ambil dari buku Untukmu Wanita hasil tulisan Ustaz Zaharuddin. Ustaz, saya pinjam letak kat sini sebagai panduan untuk saya dalam mencari jawapan dan jalan sebenar.

Jawapannya YA!! Islam membenarkan dan mengharuskan isteri atau wanita bekerja TETAPI tertakluk kepada syarat-syarat seperti berikut;

1. Terdapat keperluan yang menyebabkan dia terpaksa bekerja;

*Kematian suami dan memerlukan belanja kehidupan
*Membantu ibu bapa yang sangat miskin / suami yang uzur
*Membantu perniagaan suami
*Mempunyai kemahiran yang amat diperlukan masyarakat

2. Kerja tersebut perlulah sesuai dengan fitrah dan kemampuan fizikalnya

3. Bekerja dengan menutup aurat dan menjauhi fitnah di tempat kerja

4. Kerja tersebut tidak memerlukan untuk berdua-duaan dan bercampur secara bebas dengan yang bukan mahramnya

5. Mendapat izin wali atau suami

6. Kerjanya itu tidak menyebabkan terganggu dan terhentinya tanggungjawab di rumah terhadap anak serta suami

7. Tujuan & niat utama bekerja bukan untuk kegairahan mengumpul harta atau menyaingi kemampuan lelaki

8. Mesti berhenti sekiranya terdapat keperluan dan kecacatan dalam pendidikan anak-anak

9. Digalakkan ia dilakukan dalam tempoh tertentu / sementara sahaja dan bukan selama-lamanya sehingga pencen.

Seeloknya berhenti sejurus suami mempunyai kemampuan menanggung seluruh keluarga dengan baik. Pendek kata, wanita perlu memainkan peranan utama dalam menjaga rumah tangga, suami, anak & keluarga. Suami isteri yang bekerja diterima dalam Islam selagi mereka mamou & bijak dalam merancang pendidikan dan penjagaan anak-anak. Tidak digalakkan isteri untuk berterusan bekerja tanpa sebab-sebab yang mendesak. Jika sekadar untuk bermewah dan mudah membeli belah dengan menggunakan duit sendiri, ini tidak diterima Islam.

Menurut Syeikh Prof Dr Md 'Uqlah, tugas asasi wanita adalah amat besar iaitu penentu dan pencipta kerjaya seluruh manusia (menurut asbab kepada hukum alam).

Ini kerana mereka diberikan kedudukan oleh Islam untuk mencorak segala pemimpin lelaki masa akan datang iaitu dari kecil sehingga dewasa. Malangnya, mereka tidak menganggap besar dan mulianya tugasan itu sehingga mereka mencari kerjaya di luar rumah yang menghasilkan sedikit gaji. Justeru, kembalilah sebagai pencipta kejayaan lelaki dan wanita dari rumah. Ia adalah silibus kejayaan wanita sebenar Islam.

:: SYUKUR! ::

SYUKUR YA ALLAH, SYUKUR!

moga aku menjadi muslimah yang lebih baik selepas 'jihad' itu.

amin.

:: blissful weekend ::

oohh mata ku sangat mengantuk! bukan sebab layan WC ye kawan², tapi si aidin yang cukup cergas di subuh hari. i woke up at 4.30am for sahur, lepas sahur ingatkan nak tido kejap before bangun for subuh, but aidin seems to have a totally different idea, that he keeps me awake to play! ooh aidin sayang!!

i just came back dari kampung semalam. mula² terpikir² nak balik ke dak, sebab kalau tak balik, i have to handle 3 kids on my own, without mak and abah. nak balik kampung, i tak confident nak drive sebab friday noon i kena 'penyakit' lama. tengah drive untuk gi lunch with officemate on friday noon, skali i saw everything is spinning. nasib baik kereta tgh stop masa tuh sebab jam. imagine kalau kat atas highway and speeding at 110km/hr? i just couldn't imagine what will happened to me.

told mak about my condition, and everyone agreed that i'll balik kampung with abah. mak dah balik sehari awal sebab nak tolong my aunty to prepare for kenduri.

kids were so excited sebab nak balik rumah nyang (moyang) diorang. we only pushed off to negeri sembilan at 3.30pm, after abah dah selesai pergi kenduri kahwin in klang. kids behaved well, so did aidin who slept all the way long.

malam tuh ada kenduri tahlil untuk arwah atuk yang dah meninggal 10 years ago. semua orang balik. so rumah wan (my grandmother) penuh la dengan cucu cicit. masak lauk kampung. daging masak lemak cili api, sambal udang petai, ayam goreng, sayur campur. semua masak atas dapur kayu. perghhhh, 2 kali tambah hokay!

lepas tuh, kat kampung sekarang musim buah. especially durian. sangat² meruntun jiwa tgk durian tapi tak boleh makan banyak. (banyak means 2-3 ulas jek pun!!) sebab aidin tak tahan. tak pe. bukannya takde lagi musim durian lagi tahun depan kan?

sunday morning, takde buat apa pun. lepak jek, enjoy the morning breeze of kampung, which makes my mind so peaceful. skali si afiq nih sibuk ajak atok pegi jalan². i didn't want to follow at first,ingat nak amek peluang relaks² dengan aidin, while the elder two enjoy themselves. tapi adib has different agenda. menangis² suruh mommy ikut. so terpaksa la hangkut aidin sekali sbb i takde bawak any ebm.

abah headed to PD, nak bawak cucu² aka afiq adib main air laut + pasir. i was doubtful, as knowing my kids, mereka sangat tidak suka pasir. to them, pasir tuh kotor. kalau ada pasir 2-3 butir dalam sandal pun suruh lap!

ikutkan aje plan abah. sampai PD, beli la sand castle punya toys for them dengan harapan they'll play. rabak 30 hengget!

i managed to coax afiq to step on the sand. good sign. adib on the other hand tak nak. abah paksa adib in a nice way, aka letak pasir banyak² atas kaki dia. hehe.

afiq finally enjoy the open sea. in fact, dia lagi tarik tangan mommy dia yang tak bawak seluar spare langsung! ke tengah laut. selamat lencun seluar aku. adib at that time dah selamat duduk atas kerusi ngan mak. :P

afiq sampai sekarang dok sebut nak ajak main pasir n nak gi laut. kalau tanya si adib pulak kenapa nangis mandi laut, he'll say,"air kuat sangat, adib takut. adib tak suka kotor."

hmm.. bolehla bawak lagi bebudak nih gi beach. tapi mommy dia nak tepek sunblock bebanyak. udah le muka dah sedia tanned, takkan nak ditambah lagi kecoklatannya kan?

ps - kesian anak² bandar bila balik kampung. on the way to umah wan, si afiq tunjuk kat lembu, sambil cakap, "mommy, tuh kuda!"

:: kan? ::

kan best kalau keja ada cuti semester cam masa belajar dulu? kan? kan? kan?

huhuhuhuu, i so want to CUTIIIIIII!

:: announcement ::

rasanya blogger ada problem kot. there some comments that i received (checked my gmail) tak appear in blog. hopefully, they'll rectify it soon.

to sheri and mas, thank you for your wise words!

:: kids are sweet aite? ::

:: cerita adib ::

dia makin 'cheeky' lately. he can be very charming at times, very funny sometimes, and very helpful most of the time. makin suka main 'pretend'.

last few days, i asked him a question. actually the reason i asked him that question is to instill the sense of responsibility in him as a son, bila dia dah besar nanti. it was a very simple question actually.

mommy : adib, kalau adib dah besar nanti, boleh tak adib beli mommy roti?
adib : boleh!

and he continued, cheekily..

adib : kalau adib dah besar, adib dah keja, adib beli mommy roti came rotan. (dia dah sengih²)

mommy : terus bantai gelak sebab mommy selalu tipu afiq adib, cakap mommy dah beli rotan, and letak dalam kereta vios. kalau tak behave mommy bawak turun and give a rotan one each. :P

:: cerita afiq ::

i saw patches of stickers on the floor, and knowing my sons, i could guess it's afiq's work.

mommy : kenapa afiq lekat sticker atas lantai?
afiq : (dengan innocentnya jawab..) sebab takde buku.

adoi!

:: cerita mereka sebagai twin ::

the dialogue goes something like this..

adib : apik, jom la tolong adib. adib tak yayat (larat)

afiq dok mengelat, lari sana sini refusing. adib kept on kejar afiq and pegang² tangan afiq, enough to make afiq annoyed.

finally, afiq gave his reason.

afiq : apik beyak (berak) la.

(and i forgot whether the reason is true or not)

hahahahaha.

kids are sweet aite?

:: a hectic day! ::

it was a very hectic day for me yesterday, that prompted me to take a day off sebab nak uruskan hal anak². 3 medical appointments, 3 different drs, 2 different places. phewwwww.. i just don't know where does my energy come from??

6.30am
woke up, solat subuh and kejut anak². rushed them for a bath and get them ready for dr's appointment. lepas i dah siap, mandikan pulak si aidin, bf him and finally a cuppa of caffein with a slice of bread for me as breakfast. kids cuma sempat minum susu sorang 'sebotol' as breakfast. mommy tak sempat nak masak and maid sgtlah tidak boleh diharap dalam urusan memasak.

8.15am
geared up to hit the road nak pegi pcmc, as appointment pukul 9.15am. kena singgah rumah dulu (i'm staying at mom's place at the moment) sebab kena amek aidin's progress book. dr dah sound last appointment suruh bawak buku. :P

9.10am
managed to brace through the traffic and be on time. afiq's appointment is first followed by aidin. 2 different drs. so mommy macam org frantic lari sana sini selesaikan hal anak. nasib baik mak ikut tolong tunggu the kids.

afiq dari dulu dah kena diagnosed sinusitis. dah about 3 weeks he complained hidung gatal + runny nose in the morning. kesian tgk dia gatal hidung, sampai gosok hidung dekat sofa. OH asked me to postpone the appointment, tunggu dia balik (which might only happen next week). but i tak sanggup la nak tgk si afiq dok suffer in silent and he's the one who begged me to bring him to a dr! dapatla sepakej ubat - nasal spray + anti histamine.

then aidin's appointment is up. aidin pulak is due for his 3 months check up. aidin is now 5.36kg (almost double his weigh already!!) and he is now 58cm in length. aidin is a one happy boy. dok cooing dengan dr and nurses, much to dr's pleasure. masih belum meniarap lagi, so dr asked me to put him on his tummy more often.

11.00am
dah kul 11.00am baru la selesai semua urusan appointment + payment + medication. by this hour, perut dah berkeriuk dah. kids are hungry that we fed them with only biscuits. pegi la cafe hospital dengan harapan nak lunch awal, skali dia kata operation starts at 11.30a.

terus la amek kunci and head elsewhere for lunch. on the way back, singgah wangsa walk mall for early lunch. selesai makan semua, baru la balik rumah.

12.50 noon
we arrived home at almost 10mins before 1.00pm. and i know i have another appointment at 3pm (in TOWN!!!). adib kena jumpa dentist sebab filling yang buat last 2 weeks tercabut. dentist kat situ kasi one month warranty. OH again asked me to postpone that, but sampai bila mau postpone semua benda just to wait for him to come back entah bila.

before pushed off, i breastfeed aidin siap2 and put him to sleep. afiq dah dozed off to lala land, sebab ngantuk sgt. adib on the other hand, kena paksa bangun.

2.15pm
after performing zohor, i made my way to jalan raja laut with adib for his dental's appointment. adib dah complain banyak kali mengantuk. pujuk punya pujuk, i managed to make him stay awake sampai la habis procedure.

4.00pm
we head home finally. by this hour, i was hungry (again!) already. banyak penat ok. banyak guna tenaga! sampai melawati at about 4.30pm. tapi tak terus balik. singgah workshop dulu sebab plat no. dah 2 minggu patah tak repair². sementara tunggu org tuh repair, adib and i had light tea at nearby restaurant and terus tapau for my kids' dinner. mommy dah tak larat nak masak.

5.00pm
sampai rumah, aidin is waiting for mommy already for bf. tapi aidin kena queue. since dia tak nangis lagi, i terus feed adib and afiq with the rice that i've bought. lepas tuh, amek peluang isi my tummy dulu before picking up aidin. bf aidin and later gave him a bath.

6.45pm
it seems sikit jek ekrja yang buat, but it takes a lot of time. by this hour, i haven't perform my asar yet. and i was left with sooo little energy, that i decided i need to just close my eyes sekejap before solat. i was too tired.

lelap sekejap la kunun. sedar2 dah nak dekat pukul 7.15pm. quick shower, solat asar & terus tunggu maghrib.

7.45pm
lepas solat semua, i went upstairs to check on my boys. (rumah my mom terbalik, rooms semua dekat bawah, kitchen + living hall dekat atas). adib dah tido. (dalam hati ok, lega, one down). aidin tgh ngantuk² manja. dukung aidin kejap, tepuk² and he felt asleep. so tinggal afiq saje. amek peluang suruh maid urut belakang sebab rasa strain sgt. mak came to the rescue offer afiq ikut dia gi jejalan tolong distribute durians to my uncle.

8.45pm
i haven't perform my isyak yet, but i decided to sleep first. sangat² memerlukan tido. woke up in between hours to afiq's happy voices balik dari ikut my mother & to aidin's little sound of sucking his thumbs - a sign of dia nak mintak susu (dia jarang nangis mintak susu memalam nowadays. only sucks his thumb sampai berbunyi dengan mata still lelap. tapi jangan mommy tinggalkan dia. automatic mata dia terbukak and nangis. kuat oo magnet!)

12.34 midnight
i don't know why, i selalu terjaga at this time. bangun la ngan mata terpisat². since tahu masih berhutang solat, terus bangun and perform my isyak prayers.

4.30am
alarm dah bunyi. maknanya time untuk sahur. i masih ada a few nos of days to go. aidin tgh bf lagi. so let him do his business first before i finally woke up at 4.45am for sahur.

4.45am
panaskan nasi (ye, saya dah fed up nak suruh maid tolong saya time sahur) and had my meal. punya la tak selera. masa nak sahur, dah siap² angkut aidin naik atas sebab kalau tak i yang kena lari turun naik tangga sebab aidin very sensitif kalau mommy takde kat sebelah. (mom's house 3 storey. dapur atas sekali, and my room bawah sekali)

5.20am
settle makan sahur. si aidin b*rak la pulak. siap muntah susu sket. so kena ganti baju segala. tapi still he can senyum², sengih² kat mommy. sejuk hati.

5.30am
try tidokan aidin balik sambil breastfeed aidin. amek epluang lelap² manja.

6.30am
up and rise. harus siap pegi ke opis.

skarang - teringat kata dr semalam, for the sanity of your family, have some time off for yourself. and i wonder, how am i supposed to do that when you're the only one who run things out.

teringat masa borak with the dr smalam, when i asked her (she's a single mother for many years), how did you do it?? she said, i just do it, BUT i take a weekend off once a month, NOT from work but from the FAMILY.

hmm..

but as kak hani said to me, mothers never quit. i still have to run the race.

ya Allah, give me the strength.

ps - i lost 3.3kgs over 3 weeks.

:: happy 0.25years aidin! ::

3 months ago, at this hour, i was preparing myself to be cut up. 'cake cutting ceremony' to take lil aidin put of my tummy.

happy 3 months old sayang, and thank you for being such a darling. and thank you sebab selalu teman mommy sahur pagi². yep, eating nasi while mendukung 3 months old baby during wee hours can be very challenging.

:D

i love you sayang. i love you even more day by day!

:: andai ::

andai ini ujian dari Mu ya Allah,
berilah aku kekuatan.

:: aduhai anak.. ::

afiq : mommy, malam ni apik tido came mommy. malam esok apik tido came daddy.

aku dah mengah nak menghadap statement anak² yang rindu kat daddy.

kalau la mommy ada byk duit sayang, i'd buy daddy's time so that you will get all the attention and love you deserve.

sabar la anak mommy, mommy sendiri tengah sabarkan hati yang dah hilang sabar.

:: dumping site ::

awatla aku nih selalu jadi dumping site?

kat rumah pun dumping site.. kat opis pun dumping site..

tertekan hokkay!