Wednesday, October 28, 2009

:: Can't Measure Up ::

i was reading "The Star" on Sunday morning that i came accross a few letters applauding a writer for being very 'open' and appreciative towards his other significant. it prompted me to look for the article, and i want to share it with my viewers.

it was taken from "The Star", dated October 18th, 2009.

it's so touching..

Sunday October 18, 2009
Can’t measure up

THE article entitled Just a Mum? (Heart & Soul, StarMag, Oct 11) was truly an eye-opener for MCPs and bureaucrats. A research associate in the field of child development and human relations – that is a moral booster for all “plain” mothers and housewives.

Husbands, beware! You could be flooded with demands to do an equal share of the housework and for fair working hours.

The article was timely. I am in my early 50s, married for the past 25 years to the same woman.

It was my wife’s 46th birthday last week and our teenaged boys were asking what I was going to give her.

Not having decided what to get yet, I just smiled to myself.

I resigned from the teaching service after 10 years, got into the travel line, became a tour guide and now run a chauffeur service.

There were many nights and days when I had to be away from home and family.

And all those long years, my wife was able to run the family, manage the finances and bring up our three boys with pride and dignity.

Today I earn a four-figure salary but, strangely, payment for my services is credited into my wife’s account – at my request – for I am really a bad manager of my finances.

I am no easy SOB to live with, and my wife’s in-laws didn’t make things any easier for her. But she stuck by me and the boys – she is not one to give up.

She would defend me against my own family; she would defend the boys at the neighbourhood padang whenever anyone bullied them, be they adults or kids. The bullies feared her so much that they called her Ma Baker (after the famous American turn-of-the-last-century female outlaw).

As for her occupation, my wife is a domestic scientist. In college, she had studied domestic science and naturally, she passed with first class honours. I always thought that my mother was a very good cook, but my wife beats her in that. Believe me.

My wife could easily present papers on
How to Manage An SOB Husband for 25 Years; How to Deliver Your First Son by Caesarean Section; How to Deliver Your Second Son by Caesarean Section; How to Deliver Your Third Son Normally After Two Caesarean Sections; and Four Men and a Woman Under One Roof.

One of the best recipes in her thick cookbook, entitled Cook Better Than Your Mother-in-Law, is one on how to make the best chicken rendang in town.

Looking at her accomplishments, I feel small and ashamed. We men always make women feel small and inadequate. But my wife has proved all that wrong and in truth made the male species feel likewise.

I’m still wondering about that birthday gift. Could any gift really match or measure up to her accomplishments?

Asohan Iyahvu,

sweet isn't it?

and this is the article that he was referring to..

also taken from "The Star", dated October 11th, 2009.

Sunday October 11, 2009
Just a Mum?

A WOMAN, renewing her driver’s licence at the county clerk’s office, was asked by the woman recorder to state her occupation. She hesitated, uncertain how to classify herself.

“What I mean is,” explained the recorder, “do you have a job or are you just a ...?’’

“Of course I have a job,’’ snapped the woman. “I’m a Mum.’’

“We don’t list ‘Mum’ as an occupation, ‘housewife’ covers it,’’ said the recorder emphatically.

I forgot all about that story until one day when I found myself in the same situation, this time at my town hall. The clerk was obviously a career woman, poised, efficient, and possessed of a high-sounding title like “Official Interrogator’’ or “Town Registrar”.

“What is your occupation?’’ she probed.

What made me say it? I do not know. The words simply popped out.

“I’m a research associate in the field of child development and human relations.’’

The clerk paused, ball-point pen frozen in midair and looked up as though she had not heard right.

I repeated the title slowly, emphasising the most significant words.

Then I stared with wonder as my pronouncement was written, in bold, black ink on the official questionnaire.

“Might I ask,’’ said the clerk with new interest, “just what you do in your field?”

Coolly, without any trace of fluster in my voice, I heard myself reply, “I have a continuing programme of research (what mother doesn’t) in the laboratory and in the field, (normally I would have said indoors and out).

I’m working for my Masters, (first the Lord and then the whole family) and already have four credits (all daughters).

“Of course, the job is one of the most demanding in the humanities (any mother care to disagree?), and I often work 14 hours a day (24 is more like it).

“But the job is more challenging than most run-of-the-mill careers and the rewards are more of satisfaction rather than just money.’’

There was an increasing note of respect in the clerk’s voice as she completed the form, stood up, and personally ushered me to the door.

As I drove into our driveway, buoyed up by my glamorous new career, I was greeted by my lab assistants – ages 13, seven and three.

Upstairs I could hear our new experimental model, a six-month- old baby, in the child development programme, testing out a new vocal pattern.

I felt I had scored a beat on bureaucracy! And I had gone on the official records as someone more distinguished and indispensable to mankind than “just another Mum’’.

Motherhood! What a glorious career. Especially when there’s a title on the door.

to all SAHMs out there, this one is for you!


sheri said...

Tersentuh :)
wish everyone in the world feels that way about mothers

aishah zaharin said...

yep! very true kan?

i like the way the writer puts everything in perspective that is easy to be understood.

dila~noor said...

kalaula sume husband mcm men in the 1st article tuh?huhuhu

tersentuh sangat..dan tetibe nak jadi SAHM..manage my own lab all by myself =)

aishah zaharin said...

dila - kalau sume men cam tuh, there won't be any domestic violence or silent mental torture or depression!

undomesticwifey said...

wah...laki itu sangat suuwitttt..tapi tak ramai laki macam tu dalam dunia ni kan??..haih..

I would be a SAHM anyday kalau ekonomi mengizinkan..It beats evertyhing la..

yatie chomeyl said...

mmg terbaiklah artikel2 nih

Jue Fauzi said...

Aishah-I loooiikeee so much..mind if I copy paste to my blog?

aishah zaharin said...

go ahead jue!

aishah zaharin said...

go ahead jue!